Michael James Stone Administrator
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| | "What does the Bible say about divorce/ remarriage « Thread Started Todayat 6:38pm » | | "What does the Bible say about divorce and remarriage?"
Answer: First of all, no matter what view one takes on the issue of divorce, it is important to remember Malachi 2:16: “I hate divorce, says the LORD God of Israel.” According to the Bible, marriage is a lifetime commitment. “So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate” (Matthew 19:6). God realizes, though, that since marriages involve two sinful human beings, divorces are going to occur. In the Old Testament, He laid down some laws in order to protect the rights of divorcees, especially women (Deuteronomy 24:1-4). Jesus pointed out that these laws were given because of the hardness of people’s hearts, not because they were God’s desire (Matthew 19:8).
The controversy over whether divorce and remarriage is allowed according to the Bible revolves primarily around Jesus’ words in Matthew 5:32 and 19:9. The phrase “except for marital unfaithfulness” is the only thing in Scripture that possibly gives God’s permission for divorce and remarriage. Many interpreters understand this “exception clause” as referring to “marital unfaithfulness” during the “betrothal” period. In Jewish custom, a man and a woman were considered married even while they were still engaged or “betrothed.” According to this view, immorality during this “betrothal” period would then be the only valid reason for a divorce.
However, the Greek word translated “marital unfaithfulness” is a word which can mean any form of sexual immorality. It can mean fornication, prostitution, adultery, etc. Jesus is possibly saying that divorce is permissible if sexual immorality is committed. Sexual relations are an integral part of the marital bond: “the two will become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24; Matthew 19:5; Ephesians 5:31). Therefore, any breaking of that bond by sexual relations outside of marriage might be a permissible reason for divorce. If so, Jesus also has remarriage in mind in this passage. The phrase “and marries another” (Matthew 19:9) indicates that divorce and remarriage are allowed in an instance of the exception clause, whatever it is interpreted to be. It is important to note that only the innocent party is allowed to remarry. Although it is not stated in the text, the allowance for remarriage after a divorce is God’s mercy for the one who was sinned against, not for the one who committed the sexual immorality. There may be instances where the “guilty party” is allowed to remarry, but it is not taught in this text.
Some understand 1 Corinthians 7:15 as another “exception,” allowing remarriage if an unbelieving spouse divorces a believer. However, the context does not mention remarriage, but only says a believer is not bound to continue a marriage if an unbelieving spouse wants to leave. Others claim that abuse (spousal or child) is a valid reason for divorce even though it is not listed as such in the Bible. While this may very well be the case, it is never wise to presume upon the Word of God.
Sometimes lost in the debate over the exception clause is the fact that whatever “marital unfaithfulness” means, it is an allowance for divorce, not a requirement for it. Even when adultery is committed, a couple can, through God’s grace, learn to forgive and begin rebuilding their marriage. God has forgiven us of so much more. Surely we can follow His example and even forgive the sin of adultery (Ephesians 4:32). However, in many instances, a spouse is unrepentant and continues in sexual immorality. That is where Matthew 19:9 can possibly be applied. Many also look to quickly remarry after a divorce when God might desire them to remain single. God sometimes calls people to be single so that their attention is not divided (1 Corinthians 7:32-35). Remarriage after a divorce may be an option in some circumstances, but that does not mean it is the only option.
It is distressing that the divorce rate among professing Christians is nearly as high as that of the unbelieving world. The Bible makes it abundantly clear that God hates divorce (Malachi 2:16) and that reconciliation and forgiveness should be the marks of a believer’s life (Luke 11:4; Ephesians 4:32). However, God recognizes that divorce will occur, even among His children. A divorced and/or remarried believer should not feel any less loved by God, even if the divorce and/or remarriage is not covered under the possible exception clause of Matthew 19:9. God often uses even the sinful disobedience of Christians to accomplish great good.
For further insights on this topic,
What does the Bible say about divorce and remarriage?
For the final post in the GotQuestions.org Top 20 series, the topic is perhaps the most frustrating and discouraging. What does the Bible say about divorce and remarriage? It is extremely sad that the divorce rate among Christians is, according to some studies, the same percentage as among non-Christians. Most studies peg the divorce rate among professing Christians at around 50%. Half of all marriages, supposedly built with Christ as the foundation, fail.
Biblically speaking, remarriage is a much tougher issue than divorce. Usually, when people ask us a question like “Can I get a divorce because of ______?” what they are really asking is “Can I get a divorce because of ______, and then get remarried?” Sadly, the idea of abandoning your spouse and breaking your most solemn vow is not a sufficient deterrent. It is only if there is no remarriage allowed after the divorce that the idea of divorce becomes less attractive.
While it is strongly spoken against (Malachi 2:16; Matthew 19:6), the Bible does seem to allow divorce (Deuteronomy 24:1-4; Matthew 19:9). But, remarriage after a divorce seems only to be allowed under certain circumstances (Matthew 19:9; 1 Corinthians 7:15). Of course, there is a huge amount of disagreement over the circumstances, but, the majority of Bible scholars believe that remarriage after a divorce is permissible under certain circumstances.
For this blog post, though, I don’t really want to get into the debate. The debate is covered in the GotQuestions.org article listed below (and on other related articles). In this blog post, what I really want to say is “What is wrong with you people?!?!”
Stay true to your vows! Prove yourself to be a man or woman of integrity by not abandoning the most sacred of all human relationships. Stop giving the unbelieving world an excuse to blaspheme God (Romans 2:24)! Don’t subject your children to the pain of divorce. Don’t subject your parents to the pain of divorce. Don’t subject yourself to the pain of the divorce. Stop destroying what is intended to illustrate Christ’s undying affection for the church (Ephesians 5:22-33). Forgive, don’t forsake. Build, don’t abandon. Love, don’t leave!
Now that I have had my opportunity to vent a little, don’t get me wrong, I entirely understand that many people try everything to save a marriage, and the marriage still ends in divorce. If one spouse is hell-bent on getting a divorce, there is ultimately nothing the other spouse can do to stop it. I also entirely recognize that being married to certain people is painful – spiritually, emotionally, and physically. I am not telling an abused spouse that he/she must remain with the abuser. I am not saying that a spouse has to live with a serial adulterer. My rant is directed towards those who are abandoning their marriages for no good cause. My rant is directed towards those who are causing the divorces. My rant is directed toward those who have “fallen out of love” with their spouse and have decided that they need to find their true “soul mate.” It is to these people that “God hates divorce“ (Malachi 2:16) is directed.
If there is any point of thanks I have, it is gratitude for the motivation you have given me to be on the right side of the 50%. Thank you for motivating me to stay true to my vows, to love my wife, and to honor God by remaining committed to my marriage. | |
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